Let Your Heart Guide Your Plans

Soon, it will be Thanksgiving. How are you feeling? What are your plans? And what do you envision, hope, or want to happen?

I drove to Savannah to pick up one of my boys from college and bring him home for the Holidays. The oldest will fly home on Monday and we will all be together.

As I drove down, I made plans in my heart of how we’ll cook together, sit around our dining room table (which has lately been used more to hold musical equipment than serving dishes LOL), eat slowly and talk for a while, laugh, snuggle on the couch, and watch Mary Poppins.

Then there is a vision that will probably stay in my heart for a while because it’s one of those things that has to happen spontaneously…It’s a part of the Holidays where I imagine us all singing and making music together.

It’s a part that happened in my childhood so often (everyone in my family loved to sing) and that was easy to create when the boys were little. And it’s a part that is so sacred and precious to me that I don’t want to force it to happen.

So I hold my desire in my heart, keep my plans loose, and focus my mind on the only thing I really want to experience (and which I know will be there): love.

Do you know what I mean?

I sat in Atlanta traffic and scanned radio channels for something inspiring. Several shows were discussing how to navigate uncomfortable and divisive topics at family gatherings this Thanksgiving.

Some were offering tips and advice, and in the end, the only good answers everyone agreed on were:

see the people, not the issues
gather in gratitude, not in armor
set the disagreements and arguments aside and feast on togetherness

Soon, it will be Thanksgiving. How are you feeling? What are your plans? And what do you envision, hope, or want to happen?

I drove to Savannah to pick up one of my boys from college and bring him home for the Holidays. The oldest will fly home on Monday and we will all be together.

As I drove down, I made plans in my heart of how we’ll cook together, sit around our dining room table (which has lately been used more to hold musical equipment than serving dishes LOL), eat slowly and talk for a while, laugh, snuggle on the couch, and watch Mary Poppins.

Then there is a vision that will probably stay in my heart for a while because it’s one of those things that has to happen spontaneously…It’s a part of the Holidays where I imagine us all singing and making music together.

It’s a part that happened in my childhood so often (everyone in my family loved to sing) and that was easy to create when the boys were little. And it’s a part that is so sacred and precious to me that I don’t want to force it to happen.

So I hold my desire in my heart, keep my plans loose, and focus my mind on the only thing I really want to experience (and which I know will be there): love.

Do you know what I mean?

I sat in Atlanta traffic and scanned radio channels for something inspiring. Several shows were discussing how to navigate uncomfortable and divisive topics at family gatherings this Thanksgiving.

Some were offering tips and advice, and in the end, the only good answers everyone agreed on were:

see the people, not the issues
gather in gratitude, not in armor
set the disagreements and arguments aside and feast on togetherness

People won’t be around forever. Remember why you are gathering in the first place.

Show up with a loving, compassionate, and open heart. Let go of expectations and attachments to specific outcomes.

For example, my wish to sing together with my boys is actually a desire to experience closeness, togetherness, connection, and love. My mind connects the dots, pulls up past data (from my memory banks), and brings up a picture of us singing and making music.

It attempts to interpret what my heart desires, and sometimes it can get too stuck on recreating these specific memories as a way to get to those desires.

But a past memory can never be repeated. Years have passed and we are all different now. And some of those loved ones who were a part of it in the past aren’t with us any more.

What my heart really desires is to experience the closeness with my boys. And if I let my mind stay out of the way, my heart will be free to recognize it and receive it through many new moments.

The moments which my (open, reflective, and alert) mind can interpret as new gifts and place in the memory box of life’s treasures.

So, ask yourself these (and similar) mindful questions this weekend as you sit in silent contemplation or meditation.

What does my heart really desire?

Is it connection or is it the need to prove something?

Is it trust in God, or a need to be in control?

Is it to love and to be loved?

Is it a safe place where you can be seen, and heard, and accepted the way you are?

Is it less judgment and more compassion to accept others so they feel safe to navigate through life’s challenges?

Let your heart guide your plans and enjoy the beautiful holiday of thanks-giving. Cherish every moment with your loved ones.