Accept Who You Are and Ignore Judgments

Nine years ago, I went to Croatia for the first time after my dad had passed in 2006. It was a surprise trip for my mom’s birthday, but it was also a part of healing and nourishing the brave and courageous part of me back to life.

One evening, I went to a bar in Zagreb with my best friend Ivana Pihac. It was a Karaoke night. I went up to the DJ and asked him if he had any “Tajci” songs. I didn’t tell him it was me and he didn’t recognize me. No one in the bar did until I was in the middle of singing “Hajde da ludujemo.” When they did, people took pics and sang with me.

Some didn’t care and some rolled their eyes.

It was so liberating for me to be so unconcerned about all that… There was no pressure There were no expectations. There were no thoughts like “I had to be this or that way otherwise I’ll disappoint someone” or “I’ll end up in a tabloid and be shredded to pieces by bad headlines and negative comments.” None of that.

It was just me having fun – with my friends. Without fear.

To those of you who have always been confident in who you are, this may seem trivial. But I know many who have experienced this in their lives. When we experience abuse (of any kind) or trauma (with small “t” or big “T”) it can take us a long time to work up to being in a place where we no no longer fear being ourselves. It can take some time to feel free and safe in our own skin.

Perhaps you are showing up at a family function with a tattoo, knowing that for the first time the hurt from someone saying something bad to you, won’t hurt as much because you finally learned to love and accept yourself more than their opinion.

Or perhaps for the first time you are able to express your beliefs without fear of someone disagreeing and yelling their opinions at you, trying to convince you that you are “wrong” and “stupid” for not seeing the world through their eyes. Because you finally honor your truth and the life path that taught you all you know and understand.

Or perhaps you are finally at a place in your life where you look at everyone around you and see souls fighting the battles no one knows anything about.

Because you suffered yourself and learned that every one of us has been dealing with brokenness and pain and fear and loss.

Because you learned to be kind and gentle and forgiving and compassionate with yourself.

And because you finally know what it feels like to be on the other side of debilitating anxiety and you remember so well how much pain it can cause that you won’t allow anyone or anything to pull you back into it.

If you recognize what I’m writing about, know that going through it isn’t the hardest part – deciding to begin to heal is. Once you start the process, trust that it will get you to this wonderful place where you’ll look back and feel nothing but gratitude and love to the person you used to be.

For me, I’m deeply grateful to the woman I was nine years ago – who had the courage to get on the plane to Croatia and put herself on the list to sing her favorite Kareoke song.

So… will you commit today to begin the journey to healing? What’s the one small step you can take right now to start walking down a new path?

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

She has many passions and is dedicated to helping others while also creating an enriched life for herself and her three sons. When Tajci is not on the road performing gigs, she volunteers with local organizations dear to her heart, spends time with loved ones (often involving music!), and collaborates with other artists to bring creative projects to life.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

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