Uncategorized | Tatiana 'Tajci' Cameron

Do the Work and Trust

tatiana — Mon, 25 Jan 2021 18:38:49 +0000

Well, I was going to write a different email today, but then something amazing happened yesterday: Olivia Newton-John and her daughter Chloe Lattanzi released a song, “Window in the Wall”, which I co-wrote with two other songwriters.

I knew it was coming (and I had to keep it secret until it was officially released), but I had no idea what would happen when it was released, and more importantly, how I would feel about it.

My Nashville friends tell me it’s a big deal 🙂 And it was a bit surreal hearing Olivia talk about the song on the TODAY show, knowing we wrote it in my piano room 🙂

You know how it is… You show up every day and do your work. You keep at it, you push through the hard times, and you learn to enjoy every minute of it – because after so many ups and downs, you learn to let go of your attachment to the outcome and you trust that Love (God) will organize all the pieces (that you put your heart into) for you. (I just wrote a poem about that last week. LOL)

You find satisfaction in your work – especially when it touches someone, or provides value for someone – which is the case with all meaningful work!

And you are happy. Fulfilled.

Like my son, Blais, who got himself a job at the local grocery store. After his first day of training, I asked him what his responsibilities would be. He said “I’m in customer service. And that means my job is to make people feel welcomed, valued, seen, and heard.”

When he came home from his first day of work, he was glowing! He had been corralling shopping carts and bagging groceries for six hours, but he didn’t even mention that. ALL he experienced was interacting with customers. He felt incredibly accomplished because he told me, he got to talk to people, ask them how their day went, and make them feel good. He brought me a bunch of roses because he said he was moved by someone who was buying roses for their mother.

THIS was a life-defining moment for him. Blais’ manager could have told him his job was to bag groceries quickly and efficiently, and to compete with the next kid at the number of shopping carts they can pull in one swoop. Instead, they gave him the gift of a mindset that puts people – and service – before productivity.

I guess the manager also knows that with that mindset, Blais will naturally work faster and more efficiently – and everyone wins. And of course, this takes trust. Being pleasant to customers isn’t something a manager can put out as a neat checklist or a measurable goal. Trust.

Now, back to my song…

A few years back, when I first moved to Nashville, I met Tom Paden, a songwriter who wrote hit songs for artists like Reba McEntire. Tom suggested we co-write a song that I would record and enter it into the Eurovision Song Contest. A few days later, he showed up at my house with his writing partner, Eddie Kilgallon.

Tom and Eddie had an idea for a song about the Wall (as in the Berlin wall) – an anthem about what happens when the wall comes down and people come together.

You can imagine I had a few things to say about that, LOL… but the most important thing for me was that big changes don’t happen fast. It’s a process.

(Full disclosure here: I wasn’t talking about life in Europe. I was drawing from my marriage struggles. Matthew and I had just come out of our separation and were working on healing our relationship.)

When the conflict grows too big, we build walls because we need something to keep us from charging at each other, and constantly attacking.

Then, the wall keeps us away. But our anger and unresolved conflicts grow in our minds and hearts, which makes the other side seem full of dark shadows and scary monsters.

We keep this up for a while, but eventually we get tired (because anger and fear are exhausting, and walls make us feel constricted).

Then something happens, or someone comes along who inspires us to address the wall (because there is still the Divine that finds a way to interfere with our human quarrels and stubbornness) and we feel willing to try.

What happens in that moment is what this song talks about.

Tom and Eddie put a demo together and it came out so well that we decided to pitch it to some major artists (instead of having me sing it).

I released my attachment to the outcome, and trusted that Eddie and Tom knew what they were doing. We all wanted the song to get out there and reach a lot of people with its beautiful message and melody. Tom and Eddie did a lot of pitching, but they also trusted that the right artist would come along. Olivia Newton-John heard the song (through a very unconventional channel connected to her non-profit) and was immediately drawn to it.

🙂

Trust. Do the work and then trust.

“Window in the Wall” is perfect for the times we live in. I’ve been reading the comments on Olivia’s social media, and people are already commenting on how much they needed this shot of hope and encouragement.

So here are three things I hope can be a bit of an inspiration for you today:

(1) Keep showing up. Find little joys in everyday tasks.

If you are out of work, keep finding meaningful work – learn something, help someone, create something. Nourish your soul, mind, and heart with uplifting content – music, art. Nurture your body with healthy foods and walks in nature. Update your resume, research or contact potential employers, rebrand yourself if you have to (I’ve done that a few times…), stay in shape, and then let it go.

Trust. I know it’s easier said than done, but pushing too hard and stressing about it will only exhaust you and you won’t be at your best when an opportunity comes.

(2) Look for a window, or a crack in the wall, through which you can look to the other side.

I know it’s scary. Try to entertain a thought that those on the ‘other side’ aren’t monsters, but people with the same fears, same hurt, same pain as you. Trust and be willing to mend and heal…

(3) When something good happens in your life (unexpectedly) and you realize that it was always meant to be exactly the way it happened – not the way you envisioned, but often better – drop everything and celebrate 🙂

That’s what I did this past weekend! Check out the live online concert we did here.

MUSIC & STORY

Here is “Window in the Wall” and Olivia Newton-John!!! (Oh, how I loved singing “Hopelessly Devoted” when I was a little girl, and how I absolutely adore ONJ now. I know her bass player who tells me she is one of the kindest and sweetest people in the industry!)

The song made it to #1 on iTunes ALL MUSIC VIDEO charts, and #12 on Pop charts! Listen to it, share it with your friends and let’s help it reach millions of people!

Written by Tom Paden, Eddie Kilgallon and Tajci Cameron 🙂

Has this world forgotten how to love

Are we blinded by the hate we let inside

No one’s giving in or giving up

The lines are drawn and there’s no compromise

This isn’t who we are

It’s time for us to start

Looking for a window in the wall

Maybe we can see the other side

And find that we’re not so different after all

Looking for a window in the wall

A Sacred Energy Flows Through Us

by tatiana | Nov 24, 2020 | Blog, Uncategorized

At the beginning of each of our book study group calls, we have a check-in where everyone shares about their week. In last week’s call, I noticed how every single person had a smile on their face during that time. They talked about the good things that happened. Even...

Finding Balance: A Lesson from My Joy Sign

by tatiana | Jan 20, 2024 | Blog

I have a sign that my kids made for me as a Christmas present many years ago. It's made of a simple wooden board with the word 'Joy' spelled out in bright rope lights. Over the years, it has become my favorite decoration, one that gets the best spot in the house -...

The Power of Slowing Down

by tatiana | Jan 8, 2024 | Blog

"Slow down to speed up," the narrator's voice said. It was a week before Christmas and I was walking Luna through my neighborhood while listening to an audiobook Unreasonable Hospitality by Will Guidara. The decision to take off from work for the remainder of the...

Beyond Goals: The Art of Setting Intentions

by tatiana | Dec 28, 2023 | Blog

My recent (and intense trip) to Croatia revealed something amazing that I want to share with you - the power of intention and the beauty of living with intention.It really changes the way we experience everything. Setting an intention on enjoying the Holiday season...

« Older Entries

CONNECT WITH ME

Focus & Stay In The Present Moment

tatiana — Mon, 11 Jan 2021 14:07:26 +0000

Some of you sent me your intentions for 2021 – thank you for sharing them with me 🙂

I noticed one common thing: a deeper spiritual journey so we can create more peace and serve those in need.

You are beautiful people. I hope this post will inspire you to keep going when times get tough and when the world around us is in a storm.

I’ve been following an Instagram account @Team_Malizia. It’s a sailing vessel named “Malizia” that sails the oceans and collects data for climate change scientists.

Malizia is currently sailing around the world in a Vendee Globe 2020 race. It’s a “solo, non-stop and without assistance race around the globe.”

Let that sink in Solo. Non-stop. Without assistance. Around the world. Non-stop. In a tiny boat with two sails. No cabins. Just a cockpit.

I don’t know a lot about sailing… I just really love it. I went sailing with friends, took a few sailing classes when I lived in New York, and memorized all the parts of a sailing ship when reading Conrad’s Heart of Darkness.

I lead transformational retreats on a cruise in Croatia because there is something deeply transformational when you are out on the open sea… (important to note, we sail on a faux sailing boat with luxury cabins )

I’ve been fascinated by the videos that Malizia’s skipper Boris shares on the IG profile. Some days look magical – with beautiful sunsets and gorgeous, calm blue water. Boris smiles and you can feel the joy that sailing the open seas brings to him.

Other days, the winds are strong but just right and he beams into the camera and who-hoos as he shows his vessel foiling and rushing forward (a new word I learned – ‘foiling’ is when the boat lifts up and sails above the water’s surface, helped by the ‘foils’ on its sides).

But then there are days when Boris tunes in after bad conditions and shares how the Ocean tests his mental strength. He also talks about loneliness at sea (he’s been out for 60 days now) and the different emotions and reflections that arise.

As I’ve followed his outer – and inner – journey, one thought comes to mind: no matter what, he has to keep going.

Whether it’s cold or warm, whether he is tired or rested, grumpy, lonely, afraid, not feeling well, he has to keep going. No one else will get up for him and reef or raise the sails. He sails around the globe one day at a time.

He keeps his focus on the course but stays in the present moment, taking care of the million things skippers have to do while sailing. (Including preparing food, doing repairs when parts and sails break in storms, AND posting on social media).

“It’s not all about sailing, mental strength plays a big part in a long race,” Boris said in a video just two days before he crossed the remotest location in the world, Point Nemo (where one is closer to the International Space Station in orbit than to any land on earth).

I have to admit, I felt anxiety just imagining a lonely human on a tiny boat in the remotest location in the world…

And my emotional memory pulled out some past events in which I felt like a lonely human in a remote location. When I felt unheard, misunderstood, during my dark times of depression… One doesn’t have to sail to Point Nemo to experience this.

For Boris, crossing Point Nemo was exciting. Through each moment of his solitary journey, he has been connected with his team. The racers do stay in a pack – although they are sometimes a day of sailing apart.

Strangers and followers post comments and connect with him, and I’m sure it makes him feel appreciated and connected.

Boris also notices the fish that swim around him and, when he is closer to the land, the birds that visit him. He radiates gratitude and always thanks his support team.

Of course, my favorite moment was when he recently thanked his life (and mindset) coach 🙂

None of us have come to where we are today alone. And everyone needs a good coach once in a while.

So… where are you on your journey?

Who is your support team?

Take a moment to thank them today (people who are closest to us and support us in ordinary daily tasks, often don’t get thanked enough).

Music

Here is a perfect song about support “Because You Loved Me.” I only have this video from a live David and I did in November.

It has a few wrong notes and a few missed words, but since my intention for 2021 is to ‘let my hair down’ I’m happy to share it with you 🙂

Coaching

I’m opening a few spots for individual coaching. I can help you with setting your course, support you through storms, and coach you to get the most out of life on those beautiful calm, and sunny days.

Just go to my coaching page and we can set up a free introduction call.

We would meet on a Zoom video call for an hour-long session. As a certified coach, I guarantee strict privacy and a safe non-judgmental space.

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

She has many passions and is dedicated to helping others while also creating an enriched life for herself and her three sons.

When Tajci is not on the road performing gigs, she volunteers with local organizations dear to her heart, spends time with loved ones (often involving music!), and collaborates with other artists to bring creative projects to life.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

You might also like…

A Sacred Energy Flows Through Us

Finding Balance: A Lesson from My Joy Sign

The Power of Slowing Down

Beyond Goals: The Art of Setting Intentions

CONNECT WITH ME

What Are Your Intentions For This Year?

tatiana — Mon, 04 Jan 2021 13:41:05 +0000

I walked by the Ocean on the first day of 2021 thinking about new beginnings. My phone was still buzzing with incoming messages and notifications from my friends.

Most everyone was relieved that 2020 was over as if all struggles would have magically disappeared with the 12th strike of the clock.

I thought of all the wishes for a different, less challenging year, filled with laughter, joy, and peace.

I hoped with all of my heart that those wishes do come true – for the sake of all who suffered so much, those who are lonely, those who don’t have support or someone to listen to and love them to healing.

And I felt something in our collective energy – when we all hope and wish and pray for the same thing – moving us toward it. I smiled.

That’s why it’s good to have a new year. It’s one day when we all agree we’ll leave the past behind and try to make a better future.

I looked at the sun that burned through the clouds making what was supposed to be an overcast day in Hilton Head, SC, into a perfect, warm, and bright day.

Its reflection on the surface of the slow-moving Ocean sparkled like diamonds, showing off that a ‘beautiful life’ is only a mindset away (regardless of the crises that we may be experiencing).

I stopped and looked around – nothing that I saw indicated that it was January 1st and that something was behind us or that a new chapter, somehow better, was ahead of us.

Not the sky, the clouds, the sun, nor the Ocean. Not the dogs walking quietly by their owners nor the children playing in the sand.

And yet, everything also did! The constant process of leaving behind and beginning anew was in every wave smoothing out the footprints in the sand, in the ebbs and flows of the tide, in every movement of the sun in the sky that would soon set and reappear in the morning.

It is all so beautifully, masterfully orchestrated… it all follows a sacred, divine order in which all is good. We just have to lean into it and trust that it (God) will carry us through, no matter what.

I closed my eyes and made my own intention for this year:

to ‘let my hair down’ and be free from any expectations.

Follow my own pace, not the maddening race that surrounds me.

Begin each day with courage and hope, open-minded and open-hearted, and end it with gratitude.

Practice self-care (meaning taking time to process my experiences, resting, and getting quality sleep), so I can feel healthy and energized to make music, write, coach, and be there for my kids.

In two weeks, I’m taking another life-coaching training that focuses on mind-body-spirit well being, and I’ve already started digging into some of the teachings.

I loved the suggested practice of starting your day with a short meditation – or prayer, and bringing your intention for the year to your mind… and then releasing it to God (or a higher power).

It may seem like morning prayers. The difference between petition prayers and intention is that an intention is more about setting up a direction in which we’d like to grow. It opens up endless possibilities – and eliminates disappointment or resentment.

I’d love to hear from you:

What is your intention for this year?

What will your daily well-being practice look like?

Let me know!

Wishing you a healthy and peace-filled New Year – full of courageous growth, healing, and love.

Music

I posted Keep Your Head Up on my social media – I think it’s a perfect song to start a new year with. Especially with these lyrics:

WITH THE PAST BEHIND US
WE CAN HAVE THE LOVE WE DREAMED OF
LET GO AND BE FREE

Story

You’ve all probably heard about the devastating earthquake in Croatia that happened on December 29th. Thankfully, my mom, my family, and friends were unharmed – with an exception of the trauma they have experienced, especially after the bad earthquake they had back in March.

Everyone is on edge. People can’t sleep, and if they do, they sleep in their clothes, with a bag packed and ready by the door

Many villages around the epicenter – which was at the town of Petrinja – are destroyed and a huge number of people lost everything.

I exchanged messages with my friend, Ivanica, who lives in Croatia. It went like this:

If you feel compelled, you can donate here. Thank you!

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

She has many passions and is dedicated to helping others while also creating an enriched life for herself and her three sons.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

You might also like…

A Sacred Energy Flows Through Us

Finding Balance: A Lesson from My Joy Sign

The Power of Slowing Down

Beyond Goals: The Art of Setting Intentions

CONNECT WITH ME

How To Support Artists This Holiday Season

tatiana — Mon, 30 Nov 2020 09:16:46 +0000

I saw a post the other day that shared that Bezos and Waltons got $117B richer during the Pandemic; Target and Lowe’s profits doubled; stocks hit a record high at Apple, Home Depot, Dick’s, Costco, and Best Buy. (All verifiable, just Google it.)

And…20% of small businesses are closed.

Musicians and artists don’t even make statistics like that, because they are completely independent. 100% of my musician friends and artist are out of work.

Me included. 🙂

Recently, I was talking about this with a friend – a brutally honest friend, I might add – and he suggested:

“Fact is, most people think that ‘Fame and Fortune’ are indelibly linked.

There you were in your Patreon video, being honest and open, baring your soul with your patron supporters. (Here is the link to the video he was referring to.)

Your followers need to hear this from you.

You need to point out that independent musicians, and many self-employed in our society, have fallen through the cracks of the social safety net.

We are in uncharted territory with this shutdown, stuck in a situation that nobody envisioned, nor prepared for. You are coping the best you can under the circumstances.”

He is right.

This is not just my reality. It’s a reality for many, many of us.

A musician’s income comes from live performances. I perform live, I get paid. It’s that simple.

These days, royalties are insignificant unless you are selling a million singles (and although I sold millions of singles of my Croatian mega-hit, I don’t own any publishing for it, and performing royalties are very, very small.)

Imagine this Pandemic without music, without books, movies, arts, inspiration…

(I don’t want to even imagine it.)

So, if you are shopping this week, consider gifts from my store. Buying from artists and small businesses ALWAYS make a big difference.

And, buying gifts from my online store is like giving twice 🙂

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

She has many passions and is dedicated to helping others while also creating an enriched life for herself and her three sons.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

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You might also like…

A Sacred Energy Flows Through Us

Finding Balance: A Lesson from My Joy Sign

The Power of Slowing Down

Beyond Goals: The Art of Setting Intentions

CONNECT WITH ME

A Sacred Energy Flows Through Us

tatiana — Tue, 24 Nov 2020 12:47:27 +0000

They talked about the good things that happened. Even those who had dealt with challenges found something they were grateful for and turned hard into hopefulness.

If an alien listened to us, they would never know that collectively, we were in the middle of a really difficult time.

Humans are amazing that way. We are wired to connect in our pain, and in our hope.

When we create a safe circle of people where we trust we won’t be judged or pressured to be this-or-that way, we are able to open up and take off our guards.

What happens then is what some call ‘blessing each other’ – we experience someone else’s joy (and gratitude) as our own. We feel uplifted. Maybe even a little bit healed.

(I just came back from a check-up at my physician’s, who showed me a pic of his two-year-old at a birthday party with a huge ‘winning’ smile and his arm up in the air, as if he was saying: “Yeah!!! Being two rocks!” Immediately, joy-filled that sterile little exam room. And I forgot why I was there in the first place. LOL.)

Connecting with someone else’s joy and gratitude feels like sitting in the same refreshing stream, letting the same water wash our bodies, dusty from traveling. Or like being warmed up by the same fire.

It’s a sacred energy that flows through us, taking stress and anxiety out of our stomachs and chests, and replacing it with calm fulfillment.

And it also works the same when we connect in emotional pain, grief, or sadness… The difference is that the sharer gets to release the grip of those emotions while the others help move it and let it run down the river.

The sharer’s pain lifts a little and makes space for love that flows from the hearts of those who listen with compassion.

As much as I miss being in the same room physically – singing together, breaking bread, holding hands and each other – this year I experienced some of the deepest connections through our weekly Zoom gatherings.

(I will be doing two Zoom calls for all who participate in 25 Gifts for Christmas daily reflections this Advent season. You are invited! Click here.)

Connecting with you through these Saturday morning emails has been an incredible gift. I am grateful to those of you who share a reflection back with me. I’m grateful for many of you who receive my offering in silence.

I miss seeing you in live concerts and events, so these emails give me a platform to connect, continue to create, inspire, and support you on your journey.

Today, I also want to invite you to share in the joy and abundance and consider some gifts I have to offer for you to share with others.

Gifts Of Inspiring Stories

My son, Evan Amadeus, designed these beautiful, cozy, and soft hoodies with a small smiley in the front and QR code on the back. The QR code leads to a page with mental health resources that he put together.

The story behind this creation is that when he struggled with anxiety, although he knew help was available, it was still difficult to access it.

The hoodie makes a thoughtful and meaningful gift for someone who is passionate about raising awareness around mental health issues.

And you never know, who’s going to scan the QR code when you are in the checkout line at a store. You might save someone’s life.

Breathe, Adjust Your Mindset, Support, Take Action

tatiana — Mon, 15 Jun 2020 09:57:19 +0000

I’ll be completely transparent with you: As I sat down to write this, I got the news that our September tour has been canceled. Not only that, but the rest of the concerts I planned for this year aren’t happening either. If ‘ugh’ is a feeling, I felt “ugh, ugh, ugh.” because 90% of my income comes from live shows and touring.

A friend of mine, who is a radio announcer, wrote to me how his radio station is making huge cuts – due to businesses shutting down and not being able to advertise. We were going to produce a radio jingle for his show, and he was disappointed because we can’t get the funds to do it.

I wrote to him: “We have to keep showing up for people – you as a radio personality, me as a music artist… because without music and entertainment, life becomes hopeless…We’ll figure it out…”.

Then I turned my head to my right and let the MixTiles my son made for me remind me:

Breathe

Mindset

Support

Action

We’ll figure it out.

Making Space for Grace

This past week, I posted a video on my Patreon page, about my Closet Cleaning adventure.

What’s significant about it is that (following Marie Kondo’s KonMari method of tidying up), I took every piece of clothing out of my closet and piled it up on my bed, 2 hours before a Live Streamed Concert – part of ‘Portraits in Faith Concert Series’!

Somehow I felt strongly compelled to do this and I didn’t really think much of it (everyone cleans out their closets once in a while, right?) until it was 6:15 pm and I needed to pick out what to wear. LOL!

Only after the concert (which flowed so beautifully and really was a healing experience), I made the connection between this strange urge to clean out my closet and the need to make “space for grace.”

I needed to give myself permission to embrace the change that is happening in my life, and let go of the past because everything IS different now.

It’s like my song “Keep Your Head Up” says: “The road behind is broken, mountains shook and the earth split open” – there is no going back.

We have to keep going forward, letting go of clothes (and beliefs and systems) that don’t fit us anymore.

Make room for new clothes and, more importantly, new growth.

When our world is shattered into a million pieces, we say we will ‘re-build’ it. In the process, even if we try our hardest to rebuild it exactly the way it was before we fell apart, we can’t.

The very process of falling apart changes us. Every hardship changes us.

But when we fall apart, we have a chance to keep (and use) only the parts we want in our lives.

Like bringing only the clothes you want (and ones that fit you) into your newly organized closet.

Like replacing some that are truly worn out and no longer serve the purpose (like a worn out, stained blouse.)

So today I invite you to think about what you are willing to let go of, and what you don’t want to put back on your proverbial shelves – anger, resentment, resistance to healing and compassion, privilege, and joy, compassion, forgiveness, grace, creativity, hope, and love.

Join My Community!

Come join our community on Patreon! I do exclusive behind the scenes videos on there and you’ll have first access to new content I create! 🙂

Plus, you’ll be helping me immensely during this time in which I’m left without an income from performing.

Check out my Patreon and read about all the benefits!

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

She has many passions and is dedicated to helping others while also creating an enriched life for herself and her three sons. When Tajci is not on the road performing gigs, she volunteers with local organizations dear to her heart, spends time with loved ones (often involving music!), and collaborates with other artists to bring creative projects to life.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

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The Hardest Thing To Learn

tatiana — Mon, 08 Jun 2020 16:10:02 +0000

It’s been quite a week!

I drove my son Blais to the first day of band mini-camp, which has been modified for the pandemic and also moved around because of a prayer vigil held in our town for George Floyd.

Blais was sad that the camp was reduced to only three hours a day. He loved to be with his friends and play music with them. I wanted to tell him that things couldn’t get any worse, but I stopped myself. “Just try to enjoy what you have. And don’t wish for what it could or should be.” He was also nervous because he was going to audition for a snare position he had been dreaming of since he was a little kid.

I felt the mother’s worry and nervousness come through me, but only as a gentle wave. By now, I learned what to do – acknowledge it and let it pass through and not feed the worries with ‘what ifs’ and sadness with ‘what could have been’s.’

This process has been really helping me to stay calm through all kinds of situations.

Last week when the protests started, I wasn’t scared. Nor was I worried.

I texted Clemmie (the founder of Nashville Peacemakers, where I serve on the Board of Directors): “Sending you love. I’m grateful for all you have taught me so I’m not ignorant and I don’t feel helpless.”

And I added, “Let me know how I can support you more.”

You see, the first time I asked her about what I could do to make a difference in the lives of the kids from her (African American) community, stricken with poverty and violence, she said, “Stop trying to be a hero.”

I wanted to do something because I couldn’t stand the fact that my kids, who were growing up only 20 minutes away, had such a different experience.

“Let me do the work.” Clemmie said, “Let me do what I already do – walk the streets, get to know the kids, earn their trust, and then teach them and open up different and better paths for them. And you be behind me – support me.”

I joined her organization’s Board, listened, and learned about the kids and programs Clemmie and her volunteers provided (we operate on such a small budget, it’s a miracle!).

When I put together a fundraiser for the Mothers Over Murder Christmas dinner, many of my friends donated both money and gifts. But many people also didn’t want to get involved.

It takes trust.

It takes trust to listen to our black brothers and sisters, who are the only people who know how to heal their communities.

My job as a white person is to support leaders like Clemmie.

My job is to offer my mentorship – and not be offended if it’s not accepted. And when I do get to mentor (like in the prison), my job is to listen and guide. My job is not to offer judgment or advice.

With that knowing, I did my part and didn’t feel scared or helpless, I watched the protests while feeling our collective pain, and hoping the violent rioters and looters would face the consequences for their actions and be separated from the issues we are all wanting to correct.

…

On Thursday, Blais was anxiously awaiting the results of the Percussion auditions.

I remembered how sad he had been last year this time when he didn’t make it. He ended up playing marimba next to his big brother Evan and had a great year, but couldn’t wait for another chance to try out for the snare.

During the pandemic, I tried to encourage him to practice more. My experience of having to practice piano for hours each day to be at the level where I wanted to be was leading me to believe he wasn’t practicing enough. “At least, if you practice, you’ll know you did all you could and so it would be easier to accept what’s out of your control – for example, if other kids auditioning happen to all be snare champions, or if the number of snares needed drops.” I backed up my case.

He’d listen to me, acknowledge what I was saying to him and say: “I see your point. Thank you. I got this!”

I decided to trust him, even though I was not sure if I should have been more strict.

He made it!

“I’ve been waiting for this moment since 4th grade!” he said with a huge smile on his face, proudly showing me the message from his band teacher who complimented his hard work.

Clearly, he had it under control. He knew, and not me, what to do, and how much he had to practice.

And I had to trust him. Yes, guide him gently and support him, but most importantly trust him.

To me, the lesson and connection here is a big one. And one that’s not easily learned because it requires that I let go of certain control: as a mom, as a citizen, as a human being.

I’m still required to stay, support, show up, be active, speak up but not tell someone what to do, empower others, and be willing to take the back seat.

Here’s something to ponder:

How do you feel about trusting people around you without trying to correct them, manage them, or tell them what they should do? (I’m posing this question not as a political or racial discussion, but one of self-awareness, humility and courage.)

How is trusting another human being and letting go of control different, or similar to trusting God?

Contemplate these thoughts, stretch out your comfort zone, and (still) have a peaceful week!

Join My Community!

Come join our community on Patreon! I do exclusive behind the scenes videos on there and you’ll have first access to new content I create! 🙂

Plus, you’ll be helping me immensely during this time in which I’m left without an income from performing.

Check out my Patreon and read about all the benefits!

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

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Art That Will Melt Your Heart

tatiana — Mon, 01 Jun 2020 11:47:56 +0000

Here is to the Class of 2020! Here is to every child (and every grown-up) who’s ready to fly.

Here’s to my son Evan Amadeus, who learned so early in his childhood that living life comes with taking the falls and tumbles, bleeding through the cuts (and not just the ones on the skin) and courageously keep walking on – with hope and love.

Here’s to my son who learned to breathe deeply when anxiety came, who found comfort in helping and mentoring his peers, who is known in his class by his beautiful smile and deep joy-filled belly laughter, his music and his art (he painted shoes and water bottles for his friends, designed band T-shirts, and necklaces).

One day when Evan was 4, his little one-year-old brother Blais was crying in the back seat. I was driving and couldn’t help him. I tried to talk to Blais, but the sound of my voice only made him cry more.

Evan took his little brother’s hand and started singing to him a sweet little lullaby. Blais cried, but Evan kept singing his song over and over again, every time as gentle, patient and sweet, until Blais calmed down. I blinked really fast to clear the tears that were fogging up my vision.

He just has that special gift of caring, courageously sharing of himself (even when he is unsure and uncomfortable), and pulling up a part of him that brings comfort to others.

And he is so incredibly talented and smart and disciplined! He started singing at my concerts as soon as he could talk, started playing violin at 4, switched to piano, tried a year of guitar, and picked up mallets (vibraphone and marimba) and percussion when we moved down to Nashville.

He sits at the piano and plays jazz, composes music, and makes my heart melt.

When Matthew got sick, Evan went into his room and drew a picture for him. Over the past two years, he’s been posting his art (in progress and finished pieces) on his Instagram account @AmadeusAttemptsArt.

Because of his generous and giving spirit, I wanted to make a gift for him – and from him for the world.

Evan wrote the music piece titled “Remember.” I selected Evan’s art from his Instagram account and made it into a story (using references and memories from his childhood). Dante animated it into a short movie, and Blais did the voice of the ‘child’ 🙂

If you’d like to watch a short video about how this story came together, check it out here. I made this video for my Patrons (I do a lot of behind the scenes videos) but I unlocked it for you to be able to see it too!

Please share Evan’s video with your graduate, and anyone who might need an encouragement to not be afraid to soar – even during this challenging time of so much uncertainty and fear.

Join My Community!

Come join our community on Patreon! I do exclusive behind the scenes videos on there and you’ll have first access to new content I create! 🙂

Plus, you’ll be helping me immensely during this time in which I’m left without an income from performing.

Check out my Patreon and read about all the benefits!

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

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Accepting The Changes Around You

tatiana — Mon, 25 May 2020 20:08:48 +0000

“Everything IS already different,” I said to my youngest son Blais, on a recently tough day.

It will never be ‘back to normal’. It may be ‘forward’ to a more normalized life, but definitely not ‘back.’

Because we are 62 days older than we were when this started for us. We are changed. Different.

And so life is already new and different. It always is. Why fight it? Just accept it.

And breathe.

—

Our new puppy Luna Daisy woke me up early on Thursday morning. I opened the back door and watched her run out into the rain.

It was early enough that I didn’t feel rushed to start my day. I checked my email and saw an announcement of this year’s modified Memorial Day celebration – without the parade.

Luna came back, I wiped her paws off and let her sit in my lap. We watched the rain for a while. When the sun came out through a crack in the sky, she raised her head and looked up.

“There must be a rainbow somewhere, we just can’t see it,” I said out loud as if she was a toddler seeing this for the first time.

This made me think of my sons, and the past, and the parades…

Evan Amadeus and Blais would march with their band, and we’d all get so excited. The Memorial Day Parade was one of the highlights of the end-of-school activities.

“No more parades for Evan,” I thought and a rush of tears soaked my face. No more band, no prom, no high school hallways, no lunches. That’s it.

Luna moved to get into a more comfortable spot (she is the kind of puppy that likes to be near people, but definitely likes her space), and I got up to get my coffee.

I grabbed my journal to write my thoughts down and process this grief I was suddenly feeling.

“I can’t see the rainbow. Just the rain right now.” I wrote.

The rain had triggered the grief around all we are losing with this pandemic.

The grief brought up thoughts – and memories – that were connected with feeling sorry for myself and for others whom I love so much – those who I always wished to protect from loss and the emotional pain it brings.

But the only thing I can do is to help them learn how to get through hard stuff.

And this is what I know:

When we realize that we’ve lost something we are deeply attached to, we have to be willing to let go of it – and the pain it brings.

We need to say “I lost it, It will never be again. It’s gone.” and grieve it. Honor how it feels – sad, hurt, pained, tight around our heart, hard to breathe.

The tears will come. And we will say ‘goodbye’ and move forward.

But if I sit in that spot in my pain, letting the tears come but thinking “I wish it was different. I wish it didn’t happen this way.

I wish I was sitting in a different spot from which I could see the rainbow…” then I’m just getting caught up in a net of my unwillingness to let go. And I get more worked up – anxious like a fish that doesn’t’ swim up and away, even though it could.

I closed the journal and took a deep breath. The tears were gone – flowed away with the words I wrote on the page. I took a sip of coffee. I was ready for the day. Without any heaviness. Without any aching.

I was ready for the new.

That evening, Dante, Blais and I took Evan to a rooftop restaurant in Nashville (they just opened, servers wore masks, and there was plenty of space for safe social distancing).

As we were driving up, it was raining. The sun came out for a moment, and a double rainbow showed up for us. It was bright and happy and ours to take in.

And the song that was playing from Evan’s playlist at that very moment was “Smile.”

Yea, I could have cried right then too… wishing that things were different. Wishing that his dad, Matthew, was with us…

Wishing that the whole family was with us, that tomorrow we would have the ceremony as planned, that our town was alive with people, that so many people didn’t have to die from this illness, that there was no cancer, no bad things happening to good people…

Wishing, wishing, wishing, and crying, and feeling anxious, and sad, and getting caught in the net instead of letting go.

Swimming up and freely taking in the Joy that the very moment brings to us.

The next new moment.

So…

Are you ready for the new?

(Ready is when you are willing to let go of the ‘wishing’ and when you’re willing to trust that the rainbow will show up when you are at a place from which you can see it.)

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

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Four Tools You Can Use For Overwhelm

tatiana — Mon, 18 May 2020 08:10:15 +0000

I was sitting on my back deck drinking coffee with David, enjoying a warm May morning and watching the wind move through the maple trees. The low, lacy clouds trailed along like dandelion seeds.

It was one of those moments that was so intensely beautiful and so incredibly simple – moments that calm the noises in your head down and you find yourself being completely present. You feel easy, calm, abundant, purposeful and fulfilled. The kind of a moment in which Life is good and you lean deep into the goodness of it. The kind in which you don’t need, lack or want anything else.

“Ah! it’s so beautiful and peaceful here. Just perfect!” I said and broke the stillness.

David looked up smiling at me. He looked tired. I noticed the chipped paint of the deck railing behind him, and a crooked flower box barely hanging on. I took my cup from the old small table with a piece of plywood on top and smiled back.

This was not your picture-perfect Instagram photo. It reminded me that, due to pandemic and lack of income, I won’t be able to fix many things on and around the house this summer. It also reminded me of many the people who are stuck in small apartments – or worse, in hospitals, where they are battling this virus isolated and alone.

“What should I write about in my blog?” I asked. “Write about how everyone’s dealing with the pandemic and quarantine, isolation and economy,” David answered.

This past week I held a webinar on “How Not Let What We Can’t Control, Control Us” for Nashville Chamber of Commerce. It was hosted by Radiant Coaches Academy where I got my certification as a life coach.

The one thing I loved in the training was that, as a coach, I wasn’t supposed to offer solutions to any problems. As a coach, my job is to provide tools and guidance for each of us to find or create our own solutions.

So, along those lines, I presented a set of tools that I use when dealing with a situation that could easily overwhelm me. The webinar went really well and everyone on the call loved the tools and commented how helpful and valuable it was to them. (If you are interested you can watch the recording here).

The four tools are:

breathing as a way to get still and centered
changing our mindset around the situation (going from fear to trust)
support (leaning on our community and God)
action (taking related and unrelated actions that engage us and give us a sense of purpose and service, rather than helplessness and despair)

Here are the beautiful graphics my son Evan made for me:

Yes, there are a lot of situations in our lives that we can’t control (like when Matthew was diagnosed with cancer, or the pandemic) – and we have to accept and live through them.

But what we can control is how we react or respond to it.

Most of us do two out of the four things:

We are able to change our mindset around it (instead of seeing the hopelessness of the situation, we say “God would never give you what you can’t handle.”)
We lean on our support system (family, church community) and some of us are good at asking for professional help (from a therapist or a coach).

For many years, I did those two. And I still felt a lot of anxiety that would keep me feeling helpless. That only fed my fear and created more anxiety, and even depression.

I was stuck in a cycle.

Only when I learned to use my breath as a very tactile and physical way to calm myself, was I able to remove myself from a ‘flight or fight’ reaction to a horrific situation (which is perfectly normal) and to see the situation clearly and listen for guidance. Deep, intentional breathing helps me to get still, connect with God and know that everything will be okay.

And taking an action – one small step at a time – helps me to become an active participant in finding or creating a solution. It even helps me contribute to our collective handling of the situation. (E.g. Wearing a mask and gloves is a related action that helps slow down the spread of the virus. Creating music during the pandemic is unrelated, but still gives me a sense of purpose and productivity. It also sends out a little bit of joy and hope and perhaps can even help a few people. And who knows, it may even serve as a relaxation to a scientist who is working around the clock to find a vaccine and a cure. :))

How can you use these 4 tools in your life?

I hope you find this helpful or inspiring. Find a moment today for some grace and love-soaked presence 🙂

Tatiana “Tajci” Cameron is an award-winning music artist, published author, inspirational speaker, and certified transformational and spiritual life coach.

Tajci’s most recent projects include a meditation CD, an annual retreat & sea cruise in Croatia (that she organizes and hosts), and a multimedia CD/book (Un)Broken: Songs My Father Taught Me.

I so look forward to the Saturday emails and can’t wait to get to my inbox to read them! The inspiration, music, positivity, and faith….I need all of this so badly on some days. Thank you so much!

Carol

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Uncategorized | Tatiana 'Tajci' Cameron

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“Fact is, most people think that ‘Fame and Fortune’ are indelibly linked.

There you were in your Patreon video, being honest and open, baring your soul with your patron supporters. (Here is the link to the video he was referring to.)

Your followers need to hear this from you.

You need to point out that independent musicians, and many self-employed in our society, have fallen through the cracks of the social safety net.

We are in uncharted territory with this shutdown, stuck in a situation that nobody envisioned, nor prepared for. You are coping the best you can under the circumstances.”

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Breathe, Adjust Your Mindset, Support, Take Action

We have to keep going forward, letting go of clothes (and beliefs and systems) that don’t fit us anymore.

Join My Community!

Come join our community on Patreon! I do exclusive behind the scenes videos on there and you’ll have first access to new content I create! 🙂

Plus, you’ll be helping me immensely during this time in which I’m left without an income from performing.

Check out my Patreon and read about all the benefits!

You might also like…

The Hardest Thing To Learn

I’m still required to stay, support, show up, be active, speak up but not tell someone what to do, empower others, and be willing to take the back seat.

Join My Community!

Come join our community on Patreon! I do exclusive behind the scenes videos on there and you’ll have first access to new content I create! 🙂

Plus, you’ll be helping me immensely during this time in which I’m left without an income from performing.

Check out my Patreon and read about all the benefits!

You might also like…

Art That Will Melt Your Heart

Join My Community!

Come join our community on Patreon! I do exclusive behind the scenes videos on there and you’ll have first access to new content I create! 🙂

Plus, you’ll be helping me immensely during this time in which I’m left without an income from performing.

Check out my Patreon and read about all the benefits!

You might also like…

Accepting The Changes Around You

When we realize that we’ve lost something we are deeply attached to, we have to be willing to let go of it – and the pain it brings.

The next new moment.

You might also like…

Four Tools You Can Use For Overwhelm

But what we can control is how we react or respond to it.

How can you use these 4 tools in your life?

You might also like…